It’s funny how little has changed in a year. I still love the busy and full home. I still feel the sting that you may be our last.  I still find three children easier than two and I still feel like the more children we have the more I want. Sometimes I wonder when enough children would truly feel like enough! haha. Being a mother and caring for you and your older siblings is the light of my life and I wish this phase could go on forever.  

I worry these days full of constant chatter, singing, laughing, bickering, messes, sticky fingers, tears, hugs, stories, big ideas… will be the happiest moments of my life. I’m in the midst of it and I already miss it. You magical children and your dedicated father are my everything and I’m grateful I have the time and ability to make our relationships my biggest priority. 

Shiloh, it has been a wild year! Just before you turned one the Coronavirus pandemic hit AND we accepted an opportunity to move to England. From March to the end of July was anxiety provoking, distracting, and worrisome as we juggled concern for the health of our family and loved ones while also wondering if we were going to get our visas and move to England. I felt like every day was a struggle to stay in the moment and be truly present. My mind buzzed off to a very unpredictable future that was staring me in the face. The future is always unpredictable but in this case the reality of it felt exacerbated by the events in our lives. Despite the crazy circumstances of the past year, I still found the time and space to really enjoy you as a one year old. You are so much fun and if anyone helped bring me back to reality in this past year, it was you and your siblings.

Here’s a little about you… 

As I went to write “Dear Shiloh at 2 years old” I realized I forgot to post last year’s “Dear Shiloh at 1 year” DOH! This writing sat in my doc folder for an entire year! I felt guilty for about 30 seconds and then I figured, better late never. Shiloh’s first year in pictures and a love letter… just in time for his 2nd birthday : )

Dear Shiloh at 1 year,

Nothing marks the passing of time like a growing child. This year was fierce and fast, sweet and slow. You are (most likely) our last baby and that makes my heart sting. I can’t wrap my head around the idea because I truly love being a Mother and I love babies. I love a full, busy home and being pushed to find more patience and open-mindedness. You all force me to slow down and pay attention. I am learning so much and appreciate my growing awareness of how each of you need different things.